9 Types of Men Who Make Relationships Miserable, Relationships are meant to be partnerships filled with love, respect, and mutual support.
However, not every relationship turns out the way we hope, especially when the person you’re with exhibits toxic behaviors that create unhappiness and frustration.
There are certain types of men who, due to their emotional or psychological traits, can make relationships miserable.
They might not be bad people, but their behavior can be destructive, draining, and emotionally harmful.
Below, we will explore nine types of men who tend to make relationships unhealthy and offer tips on how to recognize them and protect yourself from getting caught in a toxic relationship.
1. The Emotionally Unavailable Man
An emotionally unavailable man is someone who either refuses or is unable to fully open up emotionally.
He may seem distant, detached, or completely uninterested in sharing his inner feelings, vulnerabilities, or thoughts with you.
This lack of emotional connection can leave you feeling isolated, confused, and frustrated in the relationship.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Lack of emotional connection: An emotionally unavailable man doesn’t provide the deep emotional connection you need in a romantic relationship. This can leave you feeling lonely, unimportant, or like you’re simply going through the motions.
- Difficulty expressing feelings: He may avoid showing affection or love through words or actions, leading to misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
- Fear of intimacy: Often, men who are emotionally unavailable are afraid of being vulnerable and are uncomfortable with deep emotional closeness, making it difficult to form a meaningful bond.
What You Can Do:
- Communicate openly: If you are in a relationship with an emotionally unavailable man, it’s important to communicate your needs and express how the lack of emotional availability affects you.
- Give space but set boundaries: While some people need space to open up, it’s essential that you don’t let this behavior continue indefinitely without setting boundaries or talking about it.
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2. The Manipulator
Manipulation is a psychological tactic where someone controls or influences another person’s thoughts, feelings, or actions in a way that benefits them, often at the expense of the other person.
A manipulative man will often twist situations or exploit your insecurities to get what he wants, whether that’s control, affection, or simply having things his way.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Psychological control: Manipulators can create confusion by distorting the truth, making you question your own perception of reality. This is called gaslighting, and it can leave you feeling powerless and emotionally drained.
- Self-serving agenda: They often prioritize their own needs and desires over yours, subtly steering the relationship in a direction that benefits them, even if it’s not in your best interest.
- Playing on insecurities: Manipulators often know exactly what buttons to push, playing on your vulnerabilities and using them to their advantage.
What You Can Do:
- Set clear boundaries: Establish firm boundaries and stick to them. Don’t allow manipulation to become a regular part of the relationship.
- Trust your instincts: If something feels off or you feel like you’re being controlled, trust your gut. Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist to help navigate the situation.
3. The Controller
Control issues in a relationship can make things miserable, especially if one partner is trying to dominate or manipulate the other.
The controller seeks to dominate every aspect of the relationship, from the way you think to where you go, what you wear, and who you hang out with.
This behavior often stems from insecurity, fear, or a desire to feel powerful.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Overstepping boundaries: Controllers often invade your personal space and violate your boundaries by making decisions for you, manipulating your choices, or demanding constant updates on your whereabouts and actions.
- Dependency: A controlling man may isolate you from friends and family to create dependency, making you rely solely on him for emotional and social fulfillment.
- Constant criticism: He may constantly criticize your choices, lifestyle, and actions to make you feel inferior, reinforcing his control.
What You Can Do:
- Assert your independence: Stand firm in asserting your autonomy. Don’t allow anyone to make decisions for you or dictate your life.
- Seek professional help: If you’re dealing with a controller, it may help to talk to a therapist or counselor, either individually or as a couple, to address unhealthy power dynamics in the relationship.
4. The Insecure Man
Insecurity in relationships can be highly destructive, especially when a man’s insecurity manifests as jealousy, possessiveness, or self-doubt.
An insecure man may constantly seek validation from you or others, and he may react negatively to your achievements or independent actions.
This constant need for reassurance can create emotional strain and dissatisfaction.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Jealousy: An insecure man may become overly jealous of your interactions with others, which can lead to unnecessary arguments and tension.
- Constant validation seeking: He may rely on you for constant reassurance that you love him or that he’s good enough, making the relationship feel emotionally taxing for you.
- Self-sabotage: His fear of being inadequate can lead to self-sabotaging behaviors or negative thinking, which can drag you down with him.
What You Can Do:
- Encourage self-worth: Help him build his confidence by encouraging him to pursue his own goals and strengths, but avoid constantly being the emotional crutch.
- Don’t feed the insecurity: Reassure him when necessary, but don’t fall into the trap of overcompensating for his insecurities at the cost of your emotional well-being.
5. The Ghoster
The ghoster is someone who disappears without warning, cutting off communication for days, weeks, or even months without explanation.
Ghosting can leave the other person feeling confused, hurt, and abandoned, making it one of the most emotionally draining behaviors in a relationship.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Emotional abandonment: Ghosting leaves you hanging, making you question what went wrong or why he disappeared without a trace.
- Lack of closure: Being ghosted prevents you from gaining closure, leaving unresolved feelings and a sense of uncertainty that makes it hard to move on.
- Unpredictability: When ghosting happens, it creates a pattern of unpredictability and emotional instability that makes you feel unimportant or disposable.
What You Can Do:
- Don’t chase after him: If he ghosts you, don’t beg for explanations or chase after him. Recognize that his behavior is a sign of disrespect and emotional immaturity.
- Focus on yourself: Heal from the emotional wounds left by ghosting by focusing on your own well-being and building stronger relationships with people who value and respect you.
6. The Critic
A constant critic is a man who regularly puts you down, belittles your achievements, or finds flaws in everything you do. While constructive criticism can be helpful in a relationship, a partner who is a perpetual critic erodes your self-esteem and leaves you feeling inadequate.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Constant negativity: A critical man often focuses on what’s wrong rather than what’s right. Over time, this behavior can wear you down emotionally and make you doubt yourself.
- Undermining confidence: His critical remarks may cause you to feel insecure about your own abilities, appearance, and self-worth.
- Damaging self-esteem: Repeated criticism can destroy your self-esteem, making you feel like you can never live up to his expectations or be good enough.
What You Can Do:
- Stand up for yourself: Don’t tolerate criticism that is hurtful or unproductive. If his comments are tearing you down, tell him how his words make you feel.
- Encourage positive reinforcement: Ask for more positive feedback and support rather than criticism. If he can’t provide that, it may be time to reevaluate the relationship.
7. The Promise Breaker
A promise breaker is a man who repeatedly makes promises and commitments but fails to follow through on them.
He may promise to do something, like take you out on a date, or make a change in his behavior, but when the time comes, he doesn’t deliver.
This lack of follow-through erodes trust and causes frustration in the relationship.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Broken trust: Constantly breaking promises can lead to a lack of trust, leaving you unsure whether he truly cares about your needs or values your feelings.
- Unreliability: He may appear unreliable or irresponsible, making it difficult for you to count on him for emotional support, decisions, or planning.
- Emotional exhaustion: Over time, you become emotionally drained from being let down, feeling like you’re in a relationship with someone who can’t be counted on.
What You Can Do:
- Address the issue: Talk to him about his failure to follow through on promises. Let him know how it affects your perception of the relationship.
- Set boundaries: If he continues breaking promises, you may need to establish boundaries and hold him accountable for his actions.
8. The Victim
A man who constantly plays the victim never takes responsibility for his actions or problems in the relationship.
He’s always blaming others or circumstances for his mistakes, which can create an imbalance in the relationship.
This behavior can lead to resentment and frustration as you end up shouldering the blame for things that aren’t your fault.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Lack of accountability: He refuses to take responsibility for his actions, leaving you to feel like the one who is always at fault.
- Emotional manipulation: By playing the victim, he can manipulate you into feeling guilty for things you didn’t do.
- Constant drama: This behavior keeps the relationship filled with unnecessary drama and conflict, making it difficult to move forward in a healthy way.
What You Can Do:
- Encourage accountability: Hold him accountable for his actions and encourage him to take responsibility for his behavior.
- Set limits: Don’t allow him to manipulate you into feeling guilty or responsible for his issues.
9. The Secret Keeper
A man who keeps secrets or withholds important information from you creates an atmosphere of mistrust in the relationship.
Whether it’s about his past, his feelings, or something that’s currently happening in his life, keeping secrets can lead to feelings of betrayal and uncertainty.
Why He Makes Relationships Miserable:
- Lack of transparency: Keeping secrets means that he’s not being fully honest with you, which creates doubt and a sense of distrust in the relationship.
- Betrayal of trust: When you find out that he’s been hiding things from you, it can feel like a betrayal, especially if it’s something significant that affects your relationship.
- Emotional distance: The secrecy can cause emotional distance between you two, preventing you from fully connecting or building intimacy.
What You Can Do:
- Ask for honesty: Encourage open communication and honesty. If he’s hiding things from you, it’s important to address this directly and ask for transparency.
- Reassess the relationship: If secrecy continues to be a pattern, it might be time to consider if this relationship is one that fosters trust and mutual respect.
Conclusion
Understanding the types of men who make relationships miserable can help you recognize destructive behaviors before they damage your emotional well-being.
Relationships should be based on mutual respect, trust, communication, and emotional support.
If you find yourself in a relationship with a man who exhibits any of these toxic traits, it’s crucial to address the issues openly and set boundaries.
You deserve to be in a relationship with someone who values you, makes you feel secure, and nurtures your emotional health.
Don’t settle for less than what you deserve.
Emma Thompson
Hi, I'm Emma Thompson, founder of MyLittleDesire. I share relationship advice, love quotes, and thoughtful gift ideas to help you express your feelings and strengthen your bonds. Let's celebrate love together!
Email – business@mylittledesire.com
