Alan Clark Quotes, born Alan Kenneth Mackenzie Clark on April 13, 1928, in London, England, was a British Conservative politician, historian, and diarist whose flamboyant personality and candid writings left a lasting mark. The son of art historian Kenneth Clark, he served as a Member of Parliament for Plymouth Sutton (1974–1992) and Kensington and Chelsea (1997–1999), holding junior ministerial roles under Margaret Thatcher. His historical works, including The Donkeys (1961) and Barbarossa (1965), stirred debate, while his Diaries (1993), covering 1983–1991, became a classic for their wit, political intrigue, and personal revelations. A passionate animal rights advocate, Clark died on September 5, 1999, from a brain tumor. These 15 quotes—sourced from his diaries, books, and interviews—reflect his insights on politics, history, and life, capturing his irreverent and provocative spirit.
15 Alan Clark Quotes
- “There are no true friends in politics. We are all sharks circling, and waiting, for traces of blood to appear in the water.” (Diaries: In Power, 1993)
- “There’s nothing so improves the mood of the Party as the imminent execution of a senior colleague.” (Diaries: In Power, 1993)
- “There are few nicer things than sitting up in bed, drinking strong tea, and reading.” (Goodreads, n.d.)
- “I only can properly enjoy carol services if I am having an illicit affair with someone in the congregation.” (Diaries: In Power, 1993, December 17, 1985)
- “In the last days before the attack a strange feeling, not so much of confidence as of fatalism, pervaded the German tank forces—if this strength could not break the Russians, then nothing would.” (Barbarossa, 1965)
- “I don’t in the least mind girls seeing my penis.” (Diaries: In Power, 1993)
- “The only solution for dealing with the IRA is to kill 600 people in one night.” (Conservative Party Conference, October 7, 1997, The Guardian, October 8, 1997)
- “I am not a fascist. Fascists are shopkeepers, I am a Nazi.” (Letter to The Guardian, cited in Brewer’s Rogues, Villains and Eccentrics, 2002)
- “So what does it matter where it was when it was hit? We could have sunk it if it’d been tied up on the quayside in a neutral port and everyone would still have been delighted.” (Interview, New Statesman and Society, February 18, 1994)
- “The trouble with Michael [Heseltine] is that he had to buy his own furniture.” (Diaries: In Power, 1993, attributed to Michael Jopling)
- “A pudgy puff-ball. The chance of him having a nervous breakdown is unlikely in one so fat.” (On Ken Clarke, Diaries: In Power, 1993)
- “If I am sacked, it is for saying what I believe and what is manifestly true. How much consolation is that? Some I suppose.” (The Alan Clark Diaries, 2004, TV series)
- “I think this is going to be a very bad year.” (The Alan Clark Diaries, 2004, TV series)
- “I hate that verb, I’m far more eclectic than that.” (On womanizing, The Guardian, September 7, 1999)
- “You cannot come here because you are not white.” (On Ugandan refugees, 1971, The Guardian, September 8, 1999)
Alan Clark’s quotes are a daring blend of wit, controversy, and unflinching candor, inspiring readers and rebels to confront life’s complexities with boldness and humor. Which one’s got you ready to stir the pot or sip tea with a good book? Drop it in the comments and keep Clark’s iconoclastic legacy alive!
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