Erma Louise Bombeck, born on February 21, 1927, in Dayton, Ohio, was a beloved American humorist, author, and syndicated columnist known for her witty takes on everyday life. Over her illustrious career, she wrote more than a dozen books, including bestsellers like “The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank,” and contributed to publications such as Good Housekeeping and the Washington Post. Bombeck’s achievements include selling over 10 million books, receiving the American Humor Award, and being inducted into the National Women’s Hall of Fame in 1996. Her quotes, drawn from books, interviews, and columns, offer humorous and heartfelt insights into life. This article features 15 of her quotes about life, showcasing her signature blend of laughter and wisdom. Below is a curated list to inspire reflection on the human experience.
15 Erma Bombeck Quotes
1. “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me.'” (Book, “A Marriage Made in Heaven…Or Too Tired for an Affair,” 1993)
2. “It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.” (Book, “Motherhood: The Second Oldest Profession,” 1983)
3. “Housework can kill you if done right.” (Interview, Good Housekeeping, 1978)
4. “Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most.” (Book, “I Want to Grow Hair, I Want to Grow Up, I Want to Go to Boise,” 1989)
5. “A friend is one who knows you and loves you just the same.” (Column, “At Wit’s End,” 1965)
6. “The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you lose your mind.” (Book, “Family: The Ties that Bind…And Gag!”, 1987)
7. “Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart.” (Interview, The New York Times, 1992)
8. “Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.” (Book, “If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits?”, 1978)
9. “Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.” (Social Media Adaptation, based on column, n.d.)
10. “Dreams have only one owner at a time. That’s why dreamers are lonely.” (Book, “When God Created Mothers,” 1996)
11. “I’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars in the hope of picking up nuggets from their drive-thru lunches.” (Interview, People Magazine, 1985)
12. “Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” (Book, “The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank,” 1976)
13. “There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.” (Column, “At Wit’s End,” 1967)
14. “A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.” (Book, “Motherhood: The Second Oldest Profession,” 1983)
15. “When humor goes, there goes civilization.” (Interview, Washington Post, 1990)
These quotes reveal Erma Bombeck’s profound ability to illuminate the absurdities and beauties of life through humor and heart. They showcase her as a keen observer of human nature, offering lessons on resilience, family, and finding joy in the mundane, all while encouraging a lighter perspective on challenges. Bombeck’s words remind us that laughter can be a powerful tool for coping with life’s ups and downs. What do you think? Share your favorite quote or a personal story inspired by Erma in the comments below.